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3/6/2010: In Episode 111 of the Animalcast, the guys get back to recording after a short hiatus. Kyle gives a brief explanation of his recent hospitalizations and then the guys engage in one of the most compelling topics ever tackled in the podcast: unscripted banter! Mike discusses his recent experiments with his group playing Pathfinder, and Kyle talks about his daring foray into the secret world of White Wolf. That's right, after unmercifully making fun of White Wolf for years, Kyle reveals his excitement over a new Hunter: the Vigil campaign he's starting with his kids. There's also other assorted nonsense which, for reasons I can't explain here, involve discussing the man-tits of various characters on Lost. That's right! We're back, bitches! 1/17/10: Without a second ball surgery to further delay this much anticipated episode, the guys finally delve into the mysteries of f-marry-kill. But this episode is extra special because all the f-marry-kill options are submitted by you, the listener. Can you feel the awesomeness? I CAN! Enjoy. 12/25/09: In Episode 107 of the Animalcast, the guys wanted to let the listeners get a chance to pose their best F/Marry/Kills and Mike and Kyle would answer them. Circumstances intervened, however, when Kyle had to rush to the hospital for emergency surgery the weekend before the recording. As a result, the entire episode gets sidetracked with the detailed and gory discussion of Kyle's surgery on his balls. Not wanting to shortchange the listeners, the guys decide to defer the listener-proposed F/Marry/Kills until next week and instead continue to talk even more about Kyle's balls. 12/19/09: The Animalcast is back in a big way in Episode 106. The guys get down to real hardcore gaming talk. REAL hardcore. This week's subject is, "How hard would you give it to (blank)?" The blank being filled in with a different D&D creature or race. Seriously, dude, how hard would you give it to a lamia? A lamia! The guys also read several emails from listeners and then pose some pretty difficult F/Marry/Kills to each other. Seriously, this is hardcore. 10/17/09: In Episode 100 of the Animalcast, the guys decide that it's time to give back to the listeners. Not wanting the fans to deprive the fans of their last opportunity to hear some legendary stories that have never been told, the guys tell all their untold stories. How did Kyle make his paralegal cry? What last two pitches did the guys never get a chance to use? Did Kyle's neighbor catch him peeping on her dancing naked in her shower? What was actually said during the missing 23 minutes? Did Kyle sing Brian's Song when Mike dropped off the call? And they even reveal what the undiscovered April Fools Day joke of 2009 was. Then they wax philosophic about what the podcast has meant to them and how proud they are of what they were able to accomplish in 100 episodes. 10/4/09: In Episode 99 of the Animalcast, the guys discuss the latest installment in their ever-educational series, the Airing of Grievances. This week the guys air their grievances against Kids Today. You know that jackass who's gunning his engine at you at the stop light, thinking he's all big-shit-McGee in a Hummer his daddy bought him as a graduation present? A Hummer? A fucking Hummer? I mean, holy shit! If I had my fucking IROC-Z that I cruised in highschool, I'd show this motherfucker how a car can tear off the stop line. A Hummer. Fucking kids today. 9/19/09: In Episode 98 of the Animalcast, the guys dig deep into their journalistic roots to bring you Geek News. What's the latest on smoking hot Megan Fox? Which geek-icon starlet has gone gay? Is the first story related to the second, and if it was... well that's just hot. In any event, the guys go to great lengths to find the stories that matter to you, you big fat nerd. So enjoy. And as always... you're welcome. 9/12/09: In Episode 97 of the Animalcast, the guys read some and listener mail from Beorgbeard, and then answer the age-old question about their listeners: are they Geeks, Nerds or Australians? In preparation for this episode, listeners sent in stories of embarrassing episodes in their lives that have scarred them permanently. Then the guys provide their verdict for each listener's story-- was it an example of them being a geek, a nerd, or just plain old Australian? Which listener got caught in their middle school library reading the Monster Manual with an erection? Which listener got de-pantsed at Gen Con? Which listener tried to hit on a female with a reference to his Wand of Cure Moderate Wounds? And most importantly, were the listeners geeks, nerds or Australian? 8/29/09: In Episode 96 of the Animalcast, the guys do a momentous top five list. It's the top five reasons they should quit the show at or before episode 100. Could it be the fans? Could it be the work? Could it be the lack of originality? Could it be that they're bored with it. Or perhaps a dispute has grown between the guys. Hmmmmm. Listen and judge for yourself. 7/25/09: In episode 92 of the Animalcast, the guys conclude their experiment in listener participation with The Fresh Grind. Listeners have posted discussion topics on the animalball message boards and they guys didn't look at or read the topics until they started recording this episode. They talk about a myriad of topics including: how to break the news to your boy/girlfriend that you're a nerd gamer; which monster is the next "it" creature; and the guys favorite cocktails. They also spend a little bit of time whining discussing the Ennies and why they didn't get nominated. 7/4/09: In Episode 91 of the Animalcast, the guys try a different angle on listener participation. Last week they asked listeners to post up questions or show topics they wanted the guys to talk about. Mike and Kyle didn't look at the thread or read any of the posts until they started this episode. It's the Fresh Grind! The listeners suggested a variety of important topics: how do you tell your co-workers that you're taking time off from work to go to Gen Con? How stupid is Shadowrun? If Mike and Kyle had to pick any celebrity to play them at the Ennies Award show win they win best podcast, who would they pick? What about that story about how Kyle played a prank on a co-worker that was so bad she locked herself in the bathroom crying for half an hour? And of course, where are the missing 23 minutes from the drunk no-prep episode? The questions and more are answered in the Animalcast's first installment of Fresh Grind. 5/31/09: In Episode 89 of the Animalcast, the guys introduce the second installment in their ongoing educational game series-- The Animalcast's Guide to Better Gaming. The topic this time: how to be a better player at your game table. From how to make the perfect "game-oriented" character to how to raise the level of discourse amongst your fellow players, the guys cover the spectrum and provide unique insights and advice for players of every game genre. No matter what game you play, every RPG player will be able to take something from this episode and make their gameplay better. 5/25/09: Proving that their gaming cred is unmatched, in Episode 88 of the Animalcast, the guys talk about current gaming news. As longtime listeners would expect, the conversation devolves into criticisms over WotC's poor decisions and failed opportunities with D&D 4th Edition. They also talk about Free RPG Day, the recent press release accusing the guys of being insensitive racists, and the announcement of several new games being launched. In non-gaming news, both Mike and Kyle giggle like 10 year old girls over the news that Dollhouse would be renewed. The guys also discuss how Felicia Day stars in the final episode of Dollhouse, and then in a truly gratuitous bout of self-congratulation, they brag about their interview with Felicia Day in Episode 70. 5/9/09: In this episode, the guys celebrate their two year anniversary the only way they know how-- A NO-PREP EPISODE! They guys think they are recording in high quality, but mid-episode something horrible occurs. Listen to stories about Mike's balls hanging out, Kyle peeping on a naked mentally handicapped girl and other odd and compelling stories. They guys wax philosophic on important topics like the new Star Trek movie and how awesome Dollhouse is. Finally, they answer the all important question- what's wrong with lesbians. It's been a good two years. 4/18/09: In Episode 84 of the Animalcast, the guys decide to shift gears from their normal wacky antics and examine the issues and obstacles related to women and the roleplaying game culture. The guys explore why tabletop roleplaying games are overwhelmingly dominated by males, and whether the limited participation of women is an actual phenomenon or just a perceived one. They discuss the potential failings of the gaming industry itself and whether large gaming companies have done enough to include all players, including women, into their most popular lines of games. Finally, the guys advise both male and female gamers about things they can do to make gaming a more inviting and enjoyable experience to women players. 4/4/09: That's right, faithful listeners, this episode is our second Animalball Roundtable! In the Animalball Roundtable, we invite our listeners to join us on the recording to answer all the important geek questions that matter. Which Brady Bunch family member was the monster? Supervillains aren't evil, they're just misunderstood, right? If your life depended on you LARPing, which genre would it be in? The Roundtable is NOT a closed invitation event. Any listener that wants to participate simply calls into the conference call and... BOOM... they're a part of the show. Why didn't you participate in these high-stakes shenanigans? I suppose only you and your insecurities can answer that question. Just because we're pointing the shame finger at you doesn't mean we judge you. Click here to listen to the podcast. And once again... you're welcome. 4/1/09: In this episode, the guys finally wade into the shady territory of actual play. If you have listened before, you know that the guys regularly deride other podcasts for having "actual play" episodes where they simply record their gaming session. Long time listeners will now that Mike and Kyle find this lazy and self-indulgent. But once they recognized that they also were lazy and self-indulgent, they decided it was time to change the world of actual play podcasts forever. 11/22/08: We've officially got over 73 hours of the Animalcast. No time better than the present for... A Retrospective: In episode 67, the guys get sentimental and sappy thinking back about their favorite and least-favorite episodes in the past year and a half. The guys give details behind specific episodes, which you can easily link to in the episode guide in the Animalcast forum. The guys also solicit listener input on the best and worst episodes and whether there is interest in another voicemail line or viewer mail episode. 11/9/08: Oh christ. This was a mistake. Podcast press release to follow: In Episode 65, the guys do another no-prep episode, something they haven't done in a year. But this time they are doing it with a twist. They're also taking shots of alcohol every 15 minutes. Needless to say, things get out of hand. This episode originally was recorded at one hour and fifty-four minutes. It has been significantly edited, mostly removing the "I'm so drunk" commentary that pervades the last half. 10/25/08: In a historical podcasting first, the Animalcast doesn't have one host-- it has 12! Unprecedented! The official scoop: In Episode 64, the show gets interactive. Very interactive. In the inaugural episode of the Animalball Roundtable, the guys are joined by ten listeners in a rapid-fire question and answer session that Mike and Kyle pose to the various fans. How would Cazmonster escape a Zombie apocalypse? Does Akiva have a better option? Other Guy and Mimekiller take issue with some superhero matchups and Crazy Elf is obsessed with Ewoks and everything Lucas did wrong in the Star Wars movies. And everyone loves the Ironman movie. This is only the tip of the iceberg, though and the discussion also turns to cannibalism and other topics. The listeners did a great job and made an awesome show. 10/19/08: Animalcast Episode 63 is up: In Episode 63, Mike and Kyle welcome guest co-host Dar to the show. Then they get down to business in this jam-packed episode all about retro video games. Showing exactly how old they are, the guys count down their top 10 retro games from the Atari 2600, Commodore 64 and Colecovision days. They also talk briefly about King of Kong an excellent documentary that both guys love. Click Here to Listen to the Podcast. 10/10/08: And the interviews keep on coming! You see that, Wil Wheaton? We don't need you! Official line: In Episode 62, the guys interview Steve Kenson, the creator of everyone's favorite supers game, Mutants and Masterminds. The talk to Steve about everything from his history with Shadowrun, Earthdawn and working for Green Ronin. Steve discusses some of his recent projects, including the Wild Card Campaign Setting for M&M. As their resident superhero expert, the guys pose some of the most controversial superhero battles that fans have longed to know who the ultimate victor would be. Finally, Steve submits to the gauntlet of the Animalball Hotseat, giving some of the most well thought out answers of any previous guest. 9/20/08: It's unbelievable! Another week and another podcast! And this week with Nick Logue! Woah! In Episode 60 the guys finally get to interview author and game designer Nick Logue. Nick talks about writing for Paizo's Pathfinder, WotC and his own awesome game company, Sinister Adventures. Never one to back down from a cussing contest, Nick brings a strong game as he tells stories of almost dying in real life playing Icy Death, troubles he got into in certain foreign countries, and he shamefully admits to his history of LARPing. They talk at length about all the new offerings at Sinister Adventures, including the upcoming "open world" adventure omnibus Razor Coast and the dark sci-fi vision of Dark Horizons. Kyle recommends that anyone unfamiliar with Nick's work should spend a couple of bucks on Sinister's Indulgences for a taste of his insanity, or go back and buy his work with Paizo, particularly the Hook Mountain Massacre. Nick then gives it his all as he braves the Animalball Hotseat, but you'll have to listen to see how many points he scores. Click here to listen! 9/13/08: Holy casting pods, Batman! Episode 59 of the Animalcast is up! Read on: In Episode 59 the guys talk about all the loot they hauled back from Gencon. Mike discusses what he likes, and more importantly what he doesn't like, about Aces and Eights. Kyle discusses his oldest son's newest addiction to Order of the Stick, which was started with an OotS book he brought back from Gencon. Both guys talk about some kids' board games their kids have enjoyed- Walk the Dogs and Penguin Rescue. Mike and Kyle both review an awesome card game from Privateer Press, Infernal Contraption, and Kyle details how his kids have loved their new Grimm campaign. Finally, Mike also talks about a hybrid game he's running that uses both Instant Game and Wushu. And even though he promised to get a link for a free download of the Wushu rules, he never gave it to Carl the Intern, so they couldn't be included in the show notes. Mike's a jerk. 9/6/08: Animalcast Episode 58 is up! Here's the poop: In Episode 58 the guys talk about their experience at the Ennie Awards. They discuss how cool it was to see Dave Arneson speak, the awesome goblin-acceptance music of Paizo, and the flagrant disregard of a dress code by Ken Hite who wore cargo pants and a Hawaiian shirt. Kyle also comments on the weird phenomenon involving White Wolf people who all seem to model their hair styles after Michael Bolton circa 1986. The guys also talk about what the Ennies can do to make the awards better, and Kyle shares a special moment that he shared with the beautiful and angelic Gertie Barden (who the guys mistakenly refer to as Baden throughout the episode). The guys wrap up the episode with a discussion of how pathetic WotC's showing was at Gencon, especially with their failure to feature anything related to Heroscape. 8/30/08: Episode 57 of the podcast is out. Here's the scoop: In Episode 57 of the Animalcast, the guys give the rundown on their trip to Indianapolis for Gencon. Click here for their pictorial travelogue of the trip. The guys talk about all the nerds in costumes, the cool dice and games they got, being overwhelmed by sheer magnitude of Gencon. They complain a bit about WotC's poor showing, and go on at length about all the "famous" people they met, including the guys from Paizo that they'd interviewed before. Some were awesome (James Jacobs) some were not (Jason Buhlman). Finally, they talk about what they'll do different next year. 8/9/08: Yes! I'm going to start updating the "What's New" Page! Here's the latest on the podcast: In Episode 56, the guys talk about their plans for GenCon-- which of course means that Kyle again serenades the audience with a new song. They also talk about Mike's progress with his kids on the Pathfinder series of adventures, which leads to another discussion (in a roundabout fashion) to the future of Paizo and the Pathfinder RPG, and the abandonment of Gleemax by WotC. Continuing the love of the largest tabletop roleplaying company, Mike and Kyle then gripe about how WotC screwed up Heroscape. Somewhere in there, they also talk about how their brother, Boner, got locked in a suitcase, dangled over a ledge, used to think he was a cat, and used to throw up at anything green-- but not all at the same time. 12/11/07: Animalball Games is proud to announce that it has completed it's magnum opus, Instant Game, and is releasing the RPG for free download on its website. Want to play a traditional fantasy wizard trapped in a modern world populated by superheroes? We've got that. How about far future elves trying to survive on a dying planet slowly being eaten by the Dark Lords of the void dimension? We've got that too. How about a Ben Franklin clone trained in drunken monkey fighting battling his way through an underground middle-earth dungeon? Yup. 12/8/07: In Animalcast Episode 30, Mike and Kyle interview independent horror movie writer/director Scott Phillips. Scott wrote and directed the cult movie classic Stink of Flesh, which the guys first discussed in Episode 23. Scott's getting ready to release his newest horror flick, Gimme Skelter. 12/2/07: Animalcast Episode 29- Due to the Thanksgiving holidays, the guys took a couple of weeks off. Fear not, faithful listener! We have outtakes! In this half-hour episode, Kyle introduces three sets of outtakes, including a discussion of their respective families' Halloween, Kyle's favorite book (House of Leaves), how Mike is a callous ass to Boner, and an indepth discussion of the 'new' television season (okay, this outtake is a bit dated)- including Bionic Woman, Reaper, Heroes and Pushing Daisies. 11/18/07: In an unprecedented experiment in cutting-edge podcasting, Mike and Kyle record an entire episode without any preparation in Animalcast Episode 28. Daring, no? In this episode, Mike and Kyle intentionally decided not to preplan any topics for this show, and when they accidently thought of things to talk about before the recording, those topics became forbidden to discuss. To re-emphasize-- they allowed themselves absolutely no preparation. 11/3/07: In Animalcast Episode 26, the guys try to talk about Heroscape, the miniature-style wargame by Hasbro. But they get sidetracked by a lot of side issues. First they offer some expensive comics in return to anyone that can provide a good, original theme song. They talk about Kyle's bad haircut and what not to tell your barber. Mike goes on about how much he loves Allen Varney and Paranoia XP. Mike and Kyle also talk about Paizo Publishing's Critical Hit Deck, and their new Pathfinder books for Dungeons and Dragons 3.5. Kyle gets nearly orgasmic reviewing Paizo's current Rise of the Runelords adventure arc. 3/3/07: Amazing new game announcement! We're realease four new games for the price of one! Enough exclamation points, here's the official press release: Four for the price of one! That’s right: four simultaneous releases from Animalball Games. 2/17/07: We've finally finished Animalball Melee! Mike's homage to the classic combat game Melee is available for free download. Here's the official press release: ABG Releases Animalball Melee for Free Download! 1/28/07: So much to say, so little space. First, I had a baby. Yes, it's number seven. Yes, I know that's a lot of kids. No, I'm not a mormon. Second- from now on, everything at Animalball is free. All our old games and the new ones we'll be rolling out soon are all free. Here's the official press release: Everything's Free at Animalball Games! 8/19/06: We're Back in Business (and Still Lazy)! My main computer I do for layout has been sick (read: unable to boot) for many months. Well we're back! Not much has happened for us, but have you seen Caz's new site? It's Hefty Wrenches and he's going to be selling his new game Covert Generations at Indie Press Revolution. As for us, ABG hasn't been doing much lately except posting up the same pointlessly funny garbage in our forums. I just posted up a new piece of fiction in the Safford Files, and if you're looking for some fun game reading, check out Mike and my collaborative effort to develop 50 Random Bar Encounters. 5/9/06: We're Lazy (again)! So, what's new with you? No kidding? That's soooo awesome. Yeah. So we've been kind of lazy. I mean... there's new Fiction That Changed the World up. And Jeff wrote a review of IG Barebones on RPGnet. And... uh... you know, Mike had a kid and my computer was down for about a month. And... well... not much has been going on. Sorry. Oh, but you know what? You know who's really been doing a bunch of stuff? Green Ronin has, that's who! Man, I envy those guys at Green Ronin. They work hard and stuff. Here's what they're up to: FREE TRUE20 QUICK START AND ADVENTURE ON TRUE20.COM April 18, 2006—Seattle, WA: Quick Start Rules and a free adventure for Green Ronin's latest hit RPG, True20 Adventure Roleplaying, are now available for download at the game's dedicated website, www.true20.com. The Quick Start Rules give gamers an overview of the True20 system and enough info to play the free adventure. "True20 Adventure Roleplaying hit stores last week," said Green Ronin Publishing President Chris Pramas, "and we want to show fans why it is the must-have RPG of 2006. These two downloads let gamers give True20 a shot without risk and we're sure they're going to like what they see." The free adventure is none other than Death in Freeport, an Origins and ENnie Award winning scenario originally written by Pramas and True20 updated by designer Steve Kenson. "What better way to show off the adaptability of True20 Adventure Roleplaying than by revising one of our own classic adventures," added Pramas. True20 Adventure Roleplaying, a 224-page hardback rulebook, can be found in quality game and bookstores now. For more information, go to www.true20.com or www.greenronin.com. Company Information Green Ronin Publishing is the first name in roleplaying games in the 21st century. Since the year 2000 no RPG company has won more awards for quality and innovation than Green Ronin Publishing and fans are still abuzz about perennial favorites like Mutants & Masterminds, Book of the Righteous, Testament, and Freeport. Hobby giant Games Workshop recognized the company's unparalleled record of excellence when Green Ronin was chosen as the exclusive RPG developer for its Warhammer and Warhammer 40,000 properties. The first product of this historic union, a new edition of Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay, won three Gold ENnies at GenCon 2005. With great licenses like Thieves' World and Black Company, groundbreaking games like Mutants & Masterminds and Blue Rose, and the best design talent in the industry, Green Ronin Publishing is the crème de la crème of RPG companies. Green Ronin Media Contact: Nicole Lindroos ( info@greenronin.com) 2/11/06: Our latest press release: Sandbox Hill and Steadfast Shield in Print! 2/3/06: A new year and a whole new feature. This month Animalball is starting what it hopes will be a very regular feature: Fiction That Changed the World! If you want all the details, click the link, but essentially it's an opportunity for people to post up amateur fiction and explain the story behind the stories. The first installment is Mesuphial, by me! In other news, Herobattle is quickly becoming one of the most recurring features on our site. We're currently running a Celebrity Battle (Karl Rove and Ben Stiller have already been slaughtered) and Mike's already announced that the next game will be Zombie Battle, with special undead rules. Sign up now! 12/31/05: What a way to say goodbye to 2005. In the last month and a half, we've had a lot of new events-- I just haven't been doing any updates. To start with, we finally started up the Safford Files again with an awesome review Mike wrote of the New Orleans-inspired book "Beyond the Storm." It's a good book for a good cause. Read Mike's full review for the scoop. We've also drafted and started the 2006 Animalball Deadpool. There's a whole scoring system and complicated whatnot invovled, but you really don't want to know the whole story... that's bad karma. Finally, we've started some fun, easy games in our PB3 forum: HeroBattle; Choose Your Own Adventure; and Battleship. New games are starting up all the time, keep checking back to sign up for the next installment. It's been a great 2005, everyone. Maybe in 2006 we'll write some games! 11/19/05: Our latest press release: ANIMALBALL GAMES RELEASES FREE DOWNLOAD OF ASCENSION TO OLYMPUS 10/20/05- Animalball Games announced last week that it was contemplating litigation against the estate of H.G. Wells for misappropriation of intellectual property. A spokesperson for the company explained that the fundamental problem were the striking similarities between H.G. Well's game Little Wars and Animalball Game's wargame Sandbox Hill. 10/9/2005: Fall Lull 2005 is on! Accordingly, we've been too lazy to do anything or update the "What's New" page. Thus, enjoy Green Ronin's latest press release: MUTANTS & MASTERMINDS SECOND EDITION NOW SHIPPING September 30, 2005--SEATTLE, WA: Mutants & Masterminds Second Edition, the most anticipated RPG of the year, has begun shipping to distributors. With a distributor release date of October 12, this will put the game in stores by the weekend of the 15th. This includes the Standard Edition and the Deluxe Edition. "If you want a copy of the Deluxe Edition, you should snap it up as soon as you see it on the shelves," says Green Ronin President Chris Pramas, "We're shipping out every copy, so stores that sell out will not be able to get more." Mutants & Masterminds debuted in 2002 and was an immediate breakout hit. Since then it has sold out three sizeable print runs and won a string of awards for quality and innovation, becoming the most popular superhero game in the RPG industry in the process. Product Information Mutants & Masterminds, Second Edition The World's Greatest Superhero Roleplaying Game Returns! It has been called "the best, most exciting superhero RPG in years." It sets "new standards in design and presentation." It has won awards that include the Pen & Paper Fan Award for Best RPG, the ENWorld Award for Best d20 RPG, and the prestigious EN World Peer Award for 2003. Now the World's Greatest Superhero Roleplaying Game is even better! Mutants & Masterminds, Second Edition is all the best of the award-winning RPG, with new updates, refinements, and expansions to make it the most complete, detailed, and fun version of superhero gaming yet! In this 256-page hardcover with stunning new cover art by Ramón Pérez, you'll find a complete game. Based on the popular Open Game License, Mutants & Masterminds has everything you need to create your own superheroes and villains. It offers more than a dozen ready-made superhero archetypes and even more ready-to-use supervillain archetypes, so you can start playing right away! Included are two introductory adventures, one providing an introduction to the award-winning Freedom City campaign setting. Don't let your super-powers fall behind! Mutants & Masterminds, Second Edition will take your game (and your heroes) to the next level! Mutants & Masterminds Second Edition Deluxe Mutants & Masterminds Second Edition Deluxe is a premium collector's item for the true superhero connoisseur. Limited to only 500 copies, this version of the new core rulebook features a red leatherette cover embossed with the M&M logo, silver-gilt page edges, and a red ribbon bookmark. No secret headquarters would be complete without Mutants & Masterminds Second Edition Deluxe! Order yours today, because when they are gone, they are gone forever. Mutants & Masterminds Second Edition Deluxe will be shipping along with the regular edition of the game at the end of September. Company Information 8/1/2005: The new installment of the Safford Files is up and this month Mike finally explains the mystery behind Animalball. What does it mean? Where did it come from? Is it a type of vegetable and is it naturally harvested in your local area? Some of these questions and more are answered in the Safford Files: What Is Animalball? (Hint: it's not water polo.) In other unimportant news, I finally got rid of the stylized graphics for the dates on this page. Now it isn't that much work to update the page. Finally, Animalball also has a livejournal account. We will be using the lj account for announcements and as an opportunity to keep us with the numerous animalballers who also have lj accounts. You're welcome 3278! 7/9/2005: In the most recent edition of the Safford Files, Mike writes a classic review of two games we used to play as kids. Awwwwww. Our most recent press release: WIZARDS WON'T BE ACQUIRING ANIMALBALL GAMES 6/9/2005: Animalball's most recent press release: Animalball Games (www.animalball.com) unfortunately must announce that its attempts to obtain Wil Wheaton (www.wilwheaton.net) as a spokesperson have failed. As Animalball Games has documented in its Featured articles (The Safford Files), it has made several lucrative offers to Wil Wheaton, including: handcrafted ceramic art, publicity stills of the founders of Animalball Games, and naming rights to an undeveloped GURPS product. As tempting as these offers were, Wil Wheaton had to decline for personal reasons. Animalball's "Wil Wheaton Is Not My Friend" shirts (www.cafepress.com/animalball) will be discontinued in the near future. Accordingly, Animalball Games is seeking resumes of other qualified spokesmen/women. Current candidates we are considering making offers to: Justin Whalin (star of the D&D movie); Vin Diesel; and Margaret Thatcher. If you would like to apply for the position, please feel free to send a resume and headshot to spokesman@animalball.com. Animalball Games is an equal opportunity employer. Animalball Games is a small, independent publisher of unique games that do not fit into the traditional mold of "mainstream" rpgs. When developing its products, ABG heavily depends on the assistance of its online community to give feedback, input and playtesting help. It is ABG's philosophy that the best games are those developed by the gamers themselves. Wil Wheaton doesn't know what he's missing. 4/23/2005: With May just around the corner, Animalball has designed an entire line of Spring Wear! Well, maybe not an entire line, but we have opened up a "Merchandise" section of our store where, in conjunction with Cafe Press, you can get Instant Game Shirts, Mugs and baby goodies! Now go to the Animalball Store at Cafe Press and celebrate your consumer impulses. Animalball Games is also trying to show its charitable side by raising money for Amnesty International, Wil Wheaton's charity of choice (at least according to his website). Animalball Games is donating all of its profits from the sale of the Wil Wheaton Is Not My Friend Shirts to Amnesty International. Can't you find it in your heart to spend a few dollars to help out Amnesty International? Think about the children. 3/12/2005: We actually have exciting new developments. Due to the "Chump Factor" of the layout and content of our previous store (e.g., not being able to immediately download purchased products, or having to purchase through paypal), ABG has decided to use RPGNow to sell all of our products. Through RPGNow, you can purchase any game and immediately download it. RPGNow has been in business for a while and has a good reputation. We're very happy with the transition. Check out the new ABG Store and judge for yourself. Even more exciting news: we have another product! Sandbox Hill is now for sale in the ABG Store. Sandbox Hill is the purest tactical wargame ever. All you need are the rules, some army men, matchbox cars, rubber bands and a hammer. Confused? Click here for the sneak peek. Go to the ABG Store to buy it now. No seriously, I'll wait. As we announced last time, we also have Caz Granberg's amazing debut for sale: The Steadfast Shield. An OGL beginning-level adventure for four to six characters, the Steadfast Shield is straightforward fantasy gaming with the dementia and twists you'd expect from Caz's brain. Click here for a look inside. You like what you see? Buy it now at the ABG Store. Finally, while the team keeps plugging away at Instant Game, we understand that the hungry masses need a fix. Lucky you, because Mike has done a basic layout on the Barebones Edition of Instant Game. It's not nearly as cool as the full version will be (it has only a fraction of the tables and text), but it will get you through those lonely nights when you need to fill that random-gaming void. 1/1/2005: It's been three months since my last update? Shame on me. But now with the holidays behind us, it's time to get back to business. And speaking of which: Steadfast Shield is for sale in the Animalball Store! Finally, Caz's OGL adventure for beginning level characters is finished and ready for download (for a moderate fee-- you know that Caz has twins to feed, right?). The end product is fantastic and I'm sure everyone will love it. Thanks to everyone who helped playtest and tweak it. Sandbox Hill-- the simulated war game with rubberbands and green army men-- is nearly completed and in the final stages of layout as we speak. It should be for sale before the end of the month. All of this progress is great because it frees us up to work on our next project: an expanded Instant Game with full tables and rules. Mike and I are pretty excited and we need playtesters to help adjust the character creation rules. I think we've run six sessions, and they've all kicked ass. Any help is welcomed. Finally, the Safford Files will return this month (with an expose on Instant Game) once I get the bugs worked out of my server (having trouble uploading files). 10/1/2004: Wow. September came and went and nothing much happened for the site. I got a new job and moved offices, so there wasn't much time for the site. But now we're back in business. What with the busy schedule, we missed publishing our mid-month edition of the Safford Files, but we're back this week with Paranoia Madness: Secret Societies. Mike is wicked smart, isn't he? The results from the last contest are up, and once again we got a great response. Make sure to check out the results, and submit your entry for this month's contest. 9/1/2004: September has come and I don't have as much to report on the games in progress-- Steadfast Shield and Sandbox hill are still in layout, and will be done as soon as we can finish them. Hopefully in the next month or so. The product is looking great, though. Our last edition of the Safford Files featured Patient Zero, a kick ass super villain from the twisted brain of Cazmonster. Needless to say it is wicked. The newest article is my classic review of the old Lost Worlds Combat Book System. Don't know what I'm talking about? Go read up on it- the game is a fun way to spend less than ten bucks. Finally, we have brought a close to yet another contest with great results. Don't forget to enter in this month's contest for your chance to win two pieces of original artwork. Nothing but the best for the animalballers. 8/1/2004: It's August and we've successfully finished our first contest. Well, I'm not sure it was successful, but at least we got a lot of good stories. The completion of one contest marks the beginning of a new contest. The August contest has fancier prizes and potentially jucier stories. Enter early and often. Since the last update, we had the Safford File's first installment of "Monsterball." Eli's Tiny Terrors are fascinating and an interesting new element to try in your campaign. Starting today, we have the Safford File's first installment of "Kyle Presents." In this article, I explain my hatred of Star Wars freaks. Why do you make it so easy for me, Star Wars Freaks? Finally, the Animalball Beer and Pretzels Challenge was a huge success. We're actually going to publish some of the games. So be sure to look for them in the store. In other retail news, progress is continuing on Cazmonster's D&D module, "The Steadfast Shield." We also anticipate finishing the final touches on the strategy/army-man epic "Sandbox Hill." These should be available in the store before years end. 7/1/2004: What's new? Everything is new! Including this page! Enough with the exclamation points. This page will be updated every month just to let you know the new goings-on with Animalball Games. As you can see, we have a new navigation logo at the top of every page that will allow you to more easily navigate around the revamped site. Along with the slightly new look, we also have added new, recurring content: The Safford Files is our page for various articles related to gaming. We're planning reviews of classic and current games; new monsters and bad-guys for various gaming genres; and metaphysical rantings about the state of gaming (right, I'm talking about "Kyle Presents"). And because you demanded it (which you didn't), there will be a new featured article twice a month. Check out the Contest Page for a new contest every month. This month, if you submit the best entry on the "Creepiest player you've ever gamed with", you will win an authentic, sandstone sculpture of an eyeball. We'll have a new contest (with new, wonderful prizes) every single month. So make sure you check it out periodically. Most importantly, the Animalball Store is open for business. We've got two products for sale: The Steadfast Shield (a kick-ass D&D adventure for beginners) and Pariah (a standalone game about mutant kids being hunted by the feds). We've also got a couple freebies to download. There's a bunch of stuff in the works as well, so check back here every month to see what new products are available. Finally, we've added a page of useful links. Yipee! A links page! Why does every site have to have a links page? Wow, I'm just so happy to be like every other site! Sigh. |
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